Too big for regular medical equipment, Sylvia Swamp is on her way to a veterinary hospital for an emergency procedure. While the ambulance workers try to keep her alive, Sylvia contemplates her life and her place in the dysfunctional family that she both idolizes and detests. Sylvia's mother, Ruth, is obsessed with the common sense advice in the book, Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care, but common sense is exactly what eludes her. Sister Sadie wants to follow in her mother's footsteps as an assistant to a magician. But once Sadie dons the sequins, Ruth must learn to share not only the applause but also the erotic attentions of Marvellous Marvin. Meanwhile, the somnolent Mr. Swamp turns to TV and booze for escape. Who in this misfit family will crack first? It appears that not even the good doctor can save the Swamps from their fate. . . .